The Marriage
 Weddings still usually begin with the Groom and his Best Man waiting inside the church for his Bride and her attendants to arrive. It is no longer 'fashionable' nor 'traditional' for the Bride to keep the Groom waiting - in fact this could cause huge problems in churches where there can be two or three weddings in a day! The Bride may be accompanied by her Father, Mother, or another significant friend or relative, for the bride is no longer 'given away' by her father to her husband, but is making her own independent choice to marry. Some couples choose to enter alone, and some do away with tradition completely and arrive together.
Welcome
After an informal welcome, there is often a hymn and a 'Preface' which explains the meaning of a Christian marriage. The minister then has to question both the couple and the congregation to ensure that there is not a legal reason why the marriage may not take place. If there is a resounding silence, the couple are free to make their declarations to one another.
Declarations
The couple each promise to 'love, comfort, honour and protect' their partner and 'be faithful to them as long as you both shall live'. This is where the well know 'I do' takes place. But it is not just the couple who make a promise; the friends and families present are asked if they will uphold the couple and their marriage in the years to come, and they too must offer a resounding 'We will!"
Vows
 The bride and groom make their vows facing one another. The person making the vows takes the others right hand as a sign of making a contract with the other. They vow:
'to have and to hold
from this day forward;
for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer,
in sickness and in health,
to love and to cherish,
till death us do part'
The couple then give one another rings as a way of sealing their contract, and as a life-long symbols of their unending bond to one another, making further vows of commitment:
'With my body I honour you,
all that I am I give to you,
and all that I have I share with you,
within the love of God,
Father, Son and Holy Spirit.'
Declaration
The minister then declares that the couple are husband and wife, often to the delight and applause of their guests.
Prayers
The prayers have a particular focus on the couple, their marriage relationship and all that life may hold for them. Some couples wish prayers for the gift of children to be included, others not. Some wish prayers for loved ones who have not been able to be present to be included. These and other personal requests can be made to the minister who would be happy to include them.
The Word: Readings and Talk or Sermon
It is usual to have one or more readings (one of which should be from the Bible) and the minister will generally give a talk or sermon.
Signing of the Registers
After you have exchanged your vows, the bride, groom and two witnesses must sign the registers. This is a legal requirement and the minister will give you a copy of the marriage certificate.
A wedding is one day - a marriage takes a lifetime
You have probably already spent many hours planning your wedding. There are so many things to think about - the dress, the cake, whom to invite, the honeymoon. All of these are important, but the wedding is just one day, while marriage should last for the rest of your lives.
Alongside the wedding preparations it is also important to spend time as a couple talking through your expectations of marriage. However much you think you have in common, you are still two separate individuals with different backgrounds, personalities, experiences, hopes and fears. The minister who is taking your service will probably want to spend some time with you talking through these issues.
Churches sometimes offer marriage preparation, perhaps as part of a group with other couples. This gives you an opportunity to think through potential areas of difficulty and how you will handle them as a couple.
Topics might include:
We hope that you have a wonderful wedding day and that it will mark the beginning of a long and very happy marriage.
Further Information
For details of the new Marriage Measure detailing changes in the law on who can marry at any particular parish, please click here
 Blessings
 Guidelines for Clergy of Re-Marriage of Divorcees
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